


Love Story

by PattRose



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Christmas Tree, Gift Fic, Hurt Blair Sandburg, Jim is a Little Shit, M/M, birthday story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-23
Updated: 2015-12-23
Packaged: 2018-05-05 14:10:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5378117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PattRose/pseuds/PattRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is one thing Jim never wanted to say to Blair, but it happened.  He will also have to ask if he's coming back when Blair begins to pack to leave.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love Story

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lyn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyn/gifts), [AnnieB](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnieB/gifts).



> A/N: For Annie B and Lyn T for their birthdays. Your prompts got me working in the same direction. No matter how hard I tried, they ended up in the same story. So, I'm putting both prompts in one story and hope you'll forgive me. It couldn't be helped. Those prompts were that good. Happy Birthday, Lyn and Annie. I hope you have a wonderful one. Being 29 every year sure helps, doesn't it? Hugs and love to both of you on your special day.

Love Story  
By PattRose  
Summary: There is one thing Jim never wanted to say to Blair, but it happened. He will also have to ask if he's coming back when Blair begins to pack to leave.  
Warnings: The summary is longer than the story. There is some bad language.  
Beta: Bluewolf  
Word Count: 4557  
Genre: Slash or at least Blair wants it to be.  
Rating: Teen  


[ ](http://s71.photobucket.com/user/PattRose1/media/love%20story_zpshsazf9qc.jpg.html)

Jim noticed that Blair had been extra lovey dovey lately and very clingy. He wasn't quite certain how he felt about this yet. First of all, he didn't want to be out and Blair did. Secondly, Blair seemed to want more from Jim than he was willing to give. He was going to have to set some boundaries. He didn't want them to get too serious, especially this fast. He found that it caused problems in the end and didn't want to deal with that at all-after all, it had only been three months.

They had plans to decorate the tree that night and Jim was actually looking forward to that. They had gotten a fake tree, since the spruce and evergreen made him sneeze and cough. Blair didn't even raise a fuss about it. Jim realized how thoughtful Blair was most of the time, but especially these days. Jim knew Blair was being nice to him so that they could come out by Christmas. Blair's dream was to have the friends in Major Crimes know about them. No one knew so far. Blair wanted to tell Megan Connor because she was his next best friend in the world. 

Blair had been offered a job of paid consultant for Major Crimes by the Commissioner and Blair accepted. He not only made money, but he got insurance and everything. He was truly one of the gang now. Jim knew that he wanted to tell everyone about the two of them but Jim had said no. Numerous times. Unfortunately, Blair wasn't the type to give up without a fight. 

Blair came bouncing into the loft at 7:00 that night and was singing a Christmas carol. The man loved being happy. Jim found this a little bit of a stumbling block in their relationship. Jim couldn't take all that bouncy, happy, happy, joy, joy all the time. Jim knew that he was a bit of a grump and accepted that. So did Blair. It didn't seem to bother Blair in the least. Blair ignored Jim just like everyone else did when he got in these moods. 

"Hey, Jim. You don't look that happy about decorating the tree. Is something wrong?"

"I thought you said you were bringing dinner," Jim answered. 

"I did. It's in the bags. I got Subway sandwiches and we're going to drink hot cocoa while we decorate the tree. Doesn't that sound fun?" Blair asked, still bouncing. 

Jim frowned and replied, "I guess. I sort of had my taste buds ready for Chinese." 

Blair's smile fell from his face and he looked so hurt that even Jim felt bad. "Man, I forgot I told you Chinese earlier. I was running late and thought sandwiches sounded good. I'm really sorry."

"It's not that big a deal, Chief. We'll make it work," Jim said, hopefully making up for being a grump. 

Jim helped Blair get everything ready on the table and they sat down to eat dinner. 

"How was your day, Chief?"

"Jim, I work in the same place as you. You know my day sucked. We had to try and find that man that is attacking those women and we have very few leads. I'm helping Rafe and Brown. But enough talk about work. What did you do once you got off? I noticed you left about three hours earlier than I did."

"I was done with all my paperwork and Simon told me to take off for the day. Since no one knows about us, I can easily get away without having to wait for you."

"Jim, are you telling me that it's one of the reasons you don't want to be out?"

"Blair, let's not do this tonight, okay? Tonight is decorate the tree night and I'm looking forward to it."

"Fine…" Blair finished chewing the bite in his mouth and then threw the rest of the sandwich away. He had suddenly lost his appetite. 

Jim looked over and could tell Blair was upset, but he wasn't giving in to Blair's little hissy fit. Jim wasn't going to come out and that's all there was to it. He finished his sandwich and said, "Ready to decorate the tree, Chief?"

"Sure, whatever," Blair answered, sounding somewhat sad. 

"Blair, you know I don't want to be out. So please don't keep bringing it up. Okay?"

"I said, whatever. Let's get this over with." Blair grabbed all the boxes with the lights, the ornaments and the star for the top of the tree. As Blair started putting the lights on the huge tree, he was becoming a little happier. Blair loved Christmas. And he was determined to make this one special for Jim. 

The two men worked side by side without saying a word. Finally Jim put some Christmas carols on and they sang while they put all the ornaments on the tree. Jim found out that he was having a good time. Jim really did enjoy Blair's company. He just didn't want everyone else to know how much they enjoyed each other's company. 

By the time they got to the star on the top of the tree, Blair was talking and laughing with Jim. Blair wasn't over all of the things that had happened or been said, but he was making the best out of the evening. Blair was determined to tell Jim something tonight that they had never covered before. 

Once the tree was done, they both stood back and smiled. 

Jim asked, "Do you want to put some presents around the bottom of the tree? I have mine wrapped already."

"I do too. I'll get mine for you and you get yours for me. We'll meet at the tree," Blair teased. 

Jim laughed all the way up the stairs to his room and his closet. Both men met at the tree about four minutes later with a handful of presents. Blair was practically bouncing with happiness. Jim had shopped without Blair nagging him. This was a first. Blair felt like this might be a really good sign. 

Jim made the hot cocoa and they sat on the sofa and talked about how great the tree looked and what a good team they made. 

Once the cocoa was done, Jim washed the cups out and put them away and sat back on the sofa again. 

He pulled Blair into his arms and started kissing him with quite a bit of need and desire. Blair was thrilled that Jim seemed to be in a better mood. They made out for about a half-hour and then Jim asked if they could take it up stairs.

"Jim, could we talk about something first?" 

Jim looked freaked out. He knew it was going to be the discussion of coming out once again.

"Oh, don't worry, it's not about coming out, man. It's something else."

"In that case Chief, I'm all ears."

Blair laughed at the funny saying and got closer to Jim and kissed him soundly. "I have something to tell you and I've waited all this time to be sure we were moving in the right direction."

"Go on…" Jim hoped this wasn't going to put him on the spot. 

"I think we're in the part of our relationship where we can tell the other one certain things. And tonight I wanted to tell you that I love you."

You could have knocked Jim over with a feather. But then Jim realized Blair probably meant as in a friendly way. Because Jim had loved Blair as a friend for years.

"You're my best friend too, Chief. We make a good team."

Jim noticed that Blair looked somewhat disappointed. "Jim, I didn't mean as your friend. I meant I love you like I can hardly breathe when I think of you, love you."

Jim pressed his lips together and didn't know what to say. "Blair, I don't know what to say. I don't think I feel like I'm in love yet. So I don't want to say it if I don't mean it. That would be wrong." Jim was saying something that he never wanted to say to Blair, ever. Why did Blair have to bring this up now? This was going to ruin everything.

Blair pulled away from Jim and said, "Well, I guess I know where we stand now. And you know what, Jim? I can't stand in the same spot as you're in. I'm way past that, so I don't want to see you again except at work. I'm packing and finding somewhere else to live tonight."

"See, I knew this was going to happen. You would get all moody and take it out on me. Now you're threatening to move out and all because I'm not ready to say I love you. I think you should be grateful that I'm being truthful."

Blair got up without saying another word and walked upstairs. He began to pack a suitcase and his backpack and, before long, he was down getting his things from the bathroom. Jim hadn't moved from the sofa. 

"At least give me a few weeks to see if I get to the same place as you, Blair."

"No, thank you, I don't want you there. I have no room in my life for you any longer. I feel like I've wasted the last three months. And to think, I just thought you were being quiet when we made love. It was because you didn't love me."

"Oh great! Now you're going to judge how we made love and if I meant it or not?"

"Jim, you were never making love, you were fucking me."

"That's a terrible thing to say, Blair."

"But it's the truth. You don't love me, so you can't make love. I'm ready. Have a good life, Jim. See you at work," Blair said as he pulled everything over to the front door. 

"Tell me one thing, Blair. Are you coming back?"

"I don't think I see a point in coming back. Have a good life," Blair repeated as he walked out the door and shut it silently behind him. 

Jim just sat there in shock. He didn't know what to do, say or feel. He never wanted to hurt Blair. He truly didn't. But yet he had. Jim had never seen such pain in Blair's face as he saw tonight. Jim was going to have to think on this for a while.

*

Blair drove down the street, out of Jim's hearing range and pulled in to the side of the road. He refused to cry. That was exactly what he wanted to do, but instead he needed to find somewhere to move to. He pulled his cell out and dialed Megan's number.

"Hello?"

"Megan, do you think I could sleep on your sofa for a few days until I find an apartment?"

"Oh my God, what did he do this time? He's such a drongo most of the time, so somehow I'm not that surprised."

"Megan, can I stay there tonight at least?" Blair asked, pitifully. 

"Of course you can. I have a sofa bed. I'll make it up now. You know where I live. If you want, we can get a two bedroom apartment together. I could use extra space and help with paying rent. My apartment is so small."

"No, I want my own place, Megan. I need to be alone."

"Sandy, I'm so sorry that you guys broke up."

"What do you mean, broke up?" Blair asked, shocked to his very core. 

"We all know you're a couple and you're in love. We see it when we're there for poker every week. We've been being patient while Jim gets the nerve to tell us about you two."

"Well, we don't have to worry about that anymore."

"Come on over and we'll have a drink and drown your sorrows." Megan hung up the phone and dialed the loft. 

Jim answered on the first ring. "Sandburg?"

"No, you drongo, it's Megan. What did you do to Sandy?" 

"It's none of your business, Megan. So stay out of it."

"Fuck you, Jimbo. I can't believe you have let Blair walk out of your life when anyone with eyes can see you're in love with him."

"Blair told you about us?" Jim asked, getting more pissed off by the second. 

Megan was more pissed than Jim was, so she said, "No, you moron. We all know about the two of you. We see the way you look at him on poker night. You can ask Simon if you don't believe me. Sandy didn't say a word about the two of you. He was shocked that we all know. He thought you two were keeping a great secret. And why is that, Jimbo?"

"This is none of your business, Connor."

"Listen here, Ellison, this is my business. Blair is my best mate and it pissed me off that you've hurt him so badly. You didn't want to come out, right? You're such a chicken shit."

Jim hung up the phone. He didn't have to listen to her. And if she called back, he wasn't going to answer. Instead he picked up the phone and called Simon. After all, Simon was a good friend. They could talk.

"Banks!"

"Sorry for bothering you, Simon, but I needed someone to talk to. Blair and I had a huge argument tonight and he moved into Connor's place, I guess."

"You guess? Your lover has left the loft and you don't know where he is?"

"How the fuck did you all know about this?" Jim was honestly shocked. 

"Jim, the two of you are in love. We all saw it every week. What was holding you back from telling your friends? Were you afraid we would disapprove?"

"Yes, partly, and part of it has to do with I don't want anyone to know that we're fucking each other."

Simon didn't say anything at first and said, "You do love him, right?"

"I don't know, Simon. I don't think so," Jim replied, sadly. 

"Oh, you told him you didn't love him? Jim, he is so in love with you, you must have broken him in two tonight. And during the holidays? What is wrong with you? What were you thinking about?"

"Simon, I have to go."

"Call me in an hour. I want to ask you some things," Simon ordered. 

"Okay, I'll think and call you back."

Jim hung up the phone and looked at it sadly. He wanted Blair to call, but why? Why did he want to talk to Blair? If he truly didn't love the man, why put Blair through anymore hell? Jim got up and started pacing. 

Jim remembered the time he finally told Carolyn that he loved her and it seemed to go downhill from that point on. No, it was better like this. Jim didn't want Blair to fall out of love with him. So he would just keep things the way they were.

*

Blair knocked on Megan's door and she pulled him in so fast his head was spinning. Then she held him so close and he let her. He wanted to stay strong, but Megan was so loving and so kind, he couldn't handle it.

Once he was done almost losing it, he pulled away from her. "Things will work out, Sandy. And you can stay as long as you'd like."

"God, I'm so lost without him and he doesn't love me."

Megan threw back her head and laughed quite loud. "Answer a couple of questions for me. Does he make love or fuck? Does he kiss you or just ignore you? Does he let you fuck him?"

"Megan, those are too personal to answer. I can't answer them. He would be so embarrassed."

"Okay, so he makes love, he kisses and you fuck him. Now that it's settled, we know he loves you. I happen to know someone that used to sleep with Jim Ellison and he said Jim was a top and wouldn't give in to being a bottom. This man hated that about Jim. So if he gave you his ass, he loves you, Sandy. There is no doubt in my mind at all. Is there any doubt in your mind?"

"I don't want to hear about someone from Jim's past, Megan."

"Sorry, Sandy. I thought it might help."

"He said he never wanted to say those words to me, but yet he did. He said he didn't love me," Blair said, sadly. 

"Jim Ellison is a big fucking liar, Sandy and you know it. Quit whining and get back over there and tell him he loves you."

Blair smiled at her and said, "I don't think it's going to be that easy."

"Stay the night and go home tomorrow. It's Christmas Eve. You belong together."

"I'll sleep on it tonight, okay?" 

"Why don't you call him and tell him you're living here now. And see what he says."

Blair pulled his cell phone out and called Jim. 

"Hello?" 

Blair wasn't used to this voice, the voice of a man who was scared and unsure of himself. Blair liked that in Jim for a change. "Hi, I just wanted to let you know that I'm living with Megan now and if you need anything, you can reach me here."

"Chief…"

"What? Chief, what? You had all night to talk and you didn't. I know you don't have anything to say to me, so just say goodbye."

"Chief…"

"Jim, what are you doing right now?"

There was a pause and finally Jim said, "I'm sitting on the sofa watching the lights blink on the tree. I'm trying to figure out what the fuck I'm doing."

"You're going to zone on the lights, so stop doing that. I just wanted to call and tell you where I was."

"Chief…"

"Jim, I'm not going to sit on the phone while you say ‘Chief’ over and over again. Go to bed and think about everything. I'll see you tomorrow at work."

"Wait…"

"Wow, you've moved up to ‘wait’ now. Wait what?"

"What will happen if I tell you I love you? Will we be together for a month, six months or a year?"

"Jim, are you asking me if I can promise what will happen tomorrow? Because you know I can't. If you're holding off because you think we won't stay together because of it, that's just sad. I love you with all my heart, but I deserve to have a man that loves me the same way. Don't you agree?"

"Yes… I think you deserve someone much better than me, Blair."

"Oh for crying out loud, if you don't want to be with me, man up. Don't say I deserve someone better than you. I chose you, you idiot."

"I do want to be with you, but I'm scared to death, Blair."

"Scared of what?" Blair really wanted to know the reason. 

"Once I told Carolyn I loved her, it went downhill really fast. And before long we got a divorce. I can't do that again, Blair."

"But you said you didn't love me, so there isn't a problem. I want to be with someone that loves me. And I don't plan on only staying for the good times. I want to be around for the bad times, the tough times and the sad times. I want to be in someone's life that wants all that."

"I would like all that, Blair."

"Jim, you don't love me. You made that perfectly clear tonight. And I'm looking for love in all the wrong places, it seems," Blair said, sadly. 

"Will you come home and talk to me?"

"About what? Jim, I think you should think about it tonight and we'll see each other at work tomorrow. Then we'll go from there."

"Chief, please come home and talk to me. Please?"

"I'm leaving my things here, so I can come back," Blair pointed out. 

"Bring your stuff with you. Please?"

"Okay, Jim. I'm giving you one last chance. This had better be good."

"Just come home." Jim hung up the phone and began to think and pace. 

Blair turned to Megan and said, "I might get an 'I love you' out of this evening after all."

"I knew he would tell you. He's just scared. Some men are. Hell, some women are. Make him say it a lot," Megan joked. 

"I'm serious, he's going to have to kiss ass and say it more than once."

"Good, now get home and make him pay," Megan kidded and kissed her best mate goodbye.

*

Jim picked up the phone and called Simon back.

"Did you come to your senses yet?" Simon barked. 

"I did. Blair is on his way home to talk. I'm going to have to do a lot of kissing ass tonight."

"TMI, Jim. What are you calling me for?"

"Simon, could we have two days off? I know it sucks, but we've never been alone for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I would really like to spend some time alone with him."

"Yeah, I was going to give you time off if you came to your senses. Two days, Jim. Make it count."

"Thank you, Simon. Thank you for understanding about us. Thank you for being such a good friend and thank you for being the easiest going boss in the world."

"Are you practicing the kissing up part on me? You're wasting your time. Now go and think of what you want to say to him when he gets there. And make it good enough for him to stay."

"Bye, Simon." Jim hung up the phone and went back to pacing.

*

Blair smiled all the way home because he realized that Jim did love him all along. He was just too chicken to tell him about it. Blair couldn't wait to hear the words come out of Jim's mouth. And Megan had guessed that Jim let Blair fuck him, but she had been wrong. Jim was the top all the way. But Blair was going to ask if Jim could be the bottom now and then. This made Blair smile even more. When he pulled up and parked, he was vibrating, he was so excited. He couldn't wait to see Jim.

*

Jim was waiting as Blair walked in the door and Blair was shocked. Jim's eyes were swollen and red from crying. _Jim cried?_

"Hey, man. Do I get a hug?" Blair asked. 

Jim walked over, shut the door and locked it and pulled Blair into his arms. He held on so tight that Blair could hardly breathe. 

Jim pulled back and looked sadly into Blair's eyes and said, "Blair, I love you so much it hurts. Sometimes that scares me. I'm sorry for everything I did tonight. I'm sorry for everything I said tonight. From now on, I'm going to tell you how much I love you all the time."

Blair pulled Jim down to his lips and kissed him very hard. "I love you too. We're going to make this work Jim. But I have one question."

"I'm ready…" Jim knew that he deserved anything Blair asked about. 

"I want to know if we can take turns in bed. You know what I mean. I want to top now and then. Not all the time, but I would love to make love to you one day. Think about this and get back to me."

"And what would you say if I said that I couldn't?"

"Then I would have to decide if I loved you enough to keep things the way they are right now. As it is, I'm in deep need of showing you how much I love you. So I was hoping for a yes."

Jim kissed Blair tenderly and whispered, "Yes."

"You're kidding me? Just like that?"

"Just like that. I love you so much, I would do anything for you. Including letting you have your wicked way with me."

Blair hugged Jim really hard and didn't want to let go. "Jim, I was never going to come back. And now you're not only telling me you love me but that I can make love to you. This is a night to remember. This is going to be our new Anniversary. It's Christmas Eve morning. Does the date suit you?"

"Suits me just fine, Blair. Why don't we go and celebrate?"

"Jim, we need to get some sleep for work tomorrow. We'll make love tonight."

"We have two days off. I called Simon. He told me if I was a good boy, I could have the days off," Jim teased. 

"You told Simon about us?" Blair was shocked. 

"Yes, I told him all about us, but he already knew. I really thought we had people fooled, but the only fool was me."

Blair threw back his head and laughed. "We were both fools. Megan knew too."

"I say we go upstairs and celebrate our new beginning. What do you think about that?" Jim asked. 

"I say, you lead and I'll follow you anywhere. I love you, Jim."

"And I love you, Blair. Please don't ever leave me again."

"I promise, next time I'll knock some sense into your head before I up and leave."

"No, promise there won't be a next time," Jim pleaded. 

"I promise."

"I promise too, Chief."

They walked up the stairs together and were so excited to have the other one back in their lives that nothing could top this feeling. Well, at least until Jim got an idea of how wonderful it was to be a bottom now and then. And Jim did indeed enjoy the new position and made sure that everyone in the building knew about it. Blair wasn't used to a loud lover, but he liked this new Jim. This Jim, that was letting himself go a little. 

"I really love you, Blair."

"I know you do. And I love you back. I have to tell you that that was my first time topping and I had a really good time."

"I don't know if you could tell, but I did too." 

Both men laughed and snuggled together for the rest of the night. 

Blair started to fall asleep and realized this was a love story. He hoped that someday they could tell someone. Not. 

The end


End file.
